#modal cloth

[srisakthitex]

How Sri Sakthi Textiles Became the Top Choice for Cotton Fabric in Erode?

In the bustling textile hub of Erode, there’s a place where quality meets tradition Sri Sakthi Textiles. Decades ago, this family-run business began with a single mission: to craft the finest cotton fabric for people across India and beyond. Word spread quickly as Sri Sakthi Textiles earned a reputation for quality and reliability, becoming the go-to source for cotton fabric in Erode.

As the business grew, so did their collection. The team introduced modal fabric, a soft and sustainable choice that quickly became a favorite among fashion designers looking for that unique blend of comfort and elegance. Soon after, they added linen fabric, perfect for those seeking a breathable, natural look that’s as stylish as it is timeless.

Each roll of fabric tells a story of craftsmanship and care, woven with the dedication that Sri Sakthi Textiles has stood by for generations. Today, designers, artisans, and businesses from all over trust Sri Sakthi Textiles to provide the very best. They know that every fabric—from cotton and modal to linen—is crafted with love and a commitment to excellence, making it an ideal choice for anyone looking to bring their creations to life with a touch of authenticity.

[alpd]

I love designing fancy clothes 🌹

[beyondethical]

Discovering the Benefits of Bamboo Clothing for Women: Style and Comfort at Beyond Ethical

In today’s world, fashion is no longer just about trends it’s about making choices that are sustainable, ethical, and comfortable. For women seeking stylish clothing that’s also eco-conscious, bamboo fabric is making waves across the fashion industry. And leading this movement in Bangalore is Beyond Ethical, widely recognized as the best clothing brand in Bangalore for sustainable and breathable fashion. With an exclusive collection of Bamboo dresses for women, Beyond Ethical offers a new way to dress smartly without compromising the planet or your comfort.

Why Choose Bamboo Clothing? Bamboo clothing is rapidly gaining popularity due to its numerous benefits. The fabric is made from the pulp of bamboo grass, which is a renewable resource that grows quickly without the need for pesticides or chemical fertilizers. This makes bamboo a much more sustainable alternative to cotton and synthetic fabrics.

Bamboo dresses for women are not only eco-friendly but also incredibly soft, breathable, and moisture-wicking. The natural fibers are gentle on the skin, making them ideal for sensitive skin types. Whether you’re heading to work, stepping out for brunch, or lounging at home, bamboo clothing ensures that you stay cool and comfortable throughout the day.

The Style Quotient Gone are the days when sustainable clothing meant boring designs. At Beyond Ethical, style and sustainability go hand-in-hand. As a leading Bamboo Clothing Store for Women, Beyond Ethical curates designs that reflect elegance, simplicity, and modern fashion. From flowy maxi dresses to chic bodycons and minimalistic shirt dresses, their bamboo collection brings sophistication and grace to your wardrobe.

One of the standout pieces in their collection is the Bamboo dress for women a versatile outfit that can be dressed up or down depending on the occasion. Pair it with flats and a sling bag for a casual day out or add heels and a statement necklace for an evening dinner. These dresses come in earthy tones and subtle pastels that are inspired by nature itself, resonating with the brand’s eco-friendly values.

Comfort Meets Functionality What truly sets bamboo clothing apart is the comfort factor. The lightweight and breathable nature of bamboo fabric allows it to regulate temperature effectively. It keeps you warm in winter and cool in summer making it a year-round wardrobe essential.

Moreover, bamboo fabric is known for its anti-bacterial and odor-resistant properties, making it perfect for women who are always on the move. Whether you’re commuting in Bangalore’s traffic or heading out for yoga, your bamboo outfit will keep you feeling fresh all day long.

At Beyond Ethical, these benefits are carefully integrated into every design. The brand uses high-quality bamboo viscose that is not only durable but also retains its softness even after multiple washes. Their production process adheres to strict ethical guidelines, ensuring fair wages and minimal environmental impact.

Beyond Ethical — A True Sustainable Pioneer Based in Bangalore, Beyond Ethical has quickly carved a niche for itself as the best clothing brand in Bangalore focused on sustainability. Their commitment to ethical fashion is evident in every piece they produce. From eco-conscious packaging to carbon-neutral shipping practices, Beyond Ethical is redefining what it means to be a responsible fashion brand.

Their Bamboo Clothing Store for Women is not just a retail space it’s a destination for conscious consumers. Each garment is designed to be timeless, minimizing the need for frequent replacements and encouraging slow fashion.

Customers also appreciate the transparency and honesty that the brand upholds. Their website offers detailed information about the sourcing, manufacturing, and care of their clothing ensuring that shoppers make informed choices.

Supporting a Greener Future Every purchase made at Beyond Ethical contributes to a larger cause. A portion of their profits is dedicated to environmental conservation and reforestation projects. When you buy a Bamboo dress for women from their store, you’re not just investing in quality fashion you’re investing in a better future for the planet.

Final Thoughts If you’re looking for sustainable, stylish, and comfortable fashion, bamboo clothing is the perfect choice. With its luxurious feel, breathable texture, and minimal ecological footprint, it ticks all the right boxes for modern-day fashion enthusiasts.

And if you’re wondering where to start your bamboo fashion journey, look no further than Beyond Ethical the best clothing brand in Bangalore for sustainable wear. Their Bamboo Clothing Store for Women offers a curated selection of elegant, ethical, and eco-friendly outfits that are perfect for the conscious, confident woman.

[hangzhouaohuas]

RIBS KNITS AH-37986 96%Modal Rayon+4%SP cloth will have better elasticity

Textile Raw Materiai Processing And Fabric Production

Rib fabric is a kind of knitted fabric with rib surface Due to the particularity of weaving method, the cloth will have better elasticity, and clothes made of elastic cloth also have many advantages. First, the clothes can recover quickly after deformation and are not easy to wrinkle and crease. Second, this kind of clothes will not have a sense of bondage, and the clothes are very comfortable both close to the body and outside.

Company Name:Hangzhou Aohua Textile Co., Ltd. Web:https://www.aohuatex.cn/product/ribs-knits-fabric/ribs-knits-ah37986-96-modal-rayon-4-sp.html ADD:Kanshan Industrial , Guali , Xiaoshan, Hangzhou, China. Phone:86-571-22813188 Email:rosewang@aohuatex.com Tip:310000 Profile:It is located in Kanshan Industrial Park, Guali Town, Xiaoshan District, Hangzhou, close to 104 National Highway and Hangzhou-Ningbo Expressway, close to Hangzhou Xiaoshan International Airport, adjacent to China Textile City, with convenient transportation and beautiful environment. The company has advanced production equipment, an excellent R&D team, and modern office facilities.

[shamanflavio]

Portal to your own Universe...The Mastana

On the path of consciousness evolution, what could be roughly called the initiatory path of becoming a shaman, a separation happens. The universe is understood under the same dynamics, but now the inner power of the apprentice is fully acknowledged, and his/her capacity is elevated to the status of being able to create his/her own portal into a personal universe. The symbolic tool used for this…

[thelien-art]

hi! i love your art, and i especially love the way you design the character’s outfits! they always look super cool and cohesive. do u have any advice for drawing clothing? (especially design wise) whenever i try and draw outfits my brain blanks unless i have an exact reference lol

Hi anon<3<3<3

I like world building, so first, I look to see if the place where the person I´m designing is described geographically, where they live, and their lifestyle. If not much is said, I look at the lands around and go from there.

I mostly put a focus on the weather, but mostly lifestyle and wealth. Of course the fauna near the person is important too, and if they have the possibility to get transported goods.

I made three versions of Maedhros from his three times living in different climates, here they are shortly, a more detailed description are down - note; this is Noldorin fashion and I depict other groups in different styles

These notes are only about the clothing, not jewelry, hair, or cosmetics.

Maedhros!Valinor:

The underwear is made of linen and here a long skjorte with a tied inner cloth with loose breaches to accompany Valinor stable weather that can easily cool you down and keep you warm at the same time. The edges of the skjorte is embroidered as it is meant to be shown. This has been seen a lot over history that an undergarment or something "sexual" meant to be hidden is shown in a glimpse - a modern equivalent would be showing the rim of your boxers or a bra strap. The clothes are long and layered and reaches the ground, unpractical for any manual labour or any wear that doesn´t have clean floors. The colours are saturated and a lot of white is used too.

Detail notes: While not noticeable I HC that Maedhros white robe is lined with gold cloth to match the embroidery around it, which is made on top of it where his purple robe is made with brocade.

Maedhros!Himring:

The underwear is not tighter and shorter to give better modality and keep warmth rather than cold. The sleeves are sewn to look big as heavy clothes can´t be used the same way, the sleeves have therefor become a new fashion symbol as well as status, it makes the arm look bigger and therefor the wear stronger, as well as give something to look at now that heavy fabrics that reaches the hands aren´t a choice anymore. All the robes reach just below the knee to still cover and fill, but also to make it easy to move in. The clothes are now looking broader to show strength and satiety. - Beleriand is in war, food is scarce, especially in the north close to Angband, and clothes are now made to make you look fat and well fed in this part of Beleriand. Fur has become an important aspect of fashion too, especially if sewn into clothes as padding or trims. Damask is used more in Himring than brocade which is used most in Doriath and Hithlum court.

Black is used due to the symbolism, but also as it is an expensive colour to hold as black as possible, it shows that someone with so much black clothes has the money to uphold it and to constantly buy new clothes to replace the old ones, as it is one of the easiest to break. - Due to Himring´s long winter and harsh climate, flowers and other forms of fauna quickly make themselves into fashion and are depicted on almost everything from walls, to tables, to clothes, to windows, and so on.

Maedhros!Amon Ereb:

The clothes here are still made to look you well fed but not in the same way as it was in Himring, as this part of Beleriand was hit much later with scarce food and therefore has a stronger hold on thin and strong fashion.

While still black, it is more gre,y which shows a fall in wealth, due to the visibility to now keep the clothes functioning for as long as possible without the possibility to carelessly throw it away.

Genreal notes on Noldorin Clothes:

Clothing are a social marker and always has been therefore it´s the same for the Noldor. There is a difference between the classes of society in how clothes are worn and the decorations used, to quickly show rank and status to those around you. Usually, the less practical your clothes are, the richer you are.

The style of clothes is also tied to your rank, meaning someone of one rank can´t wear a certain type of clothing style as that is outside of their social class. Different textile techniques are also sometimes defined by your rank.

Notes on fabric and technics:

Brocade and damask are also used a lot due to the hardship of producing it, where a cheaper solution would be printed patterns to those outside of the elite. Brocade is usually worn to court, where damask is a more daily solution as it is mostly made on linen and doesn´t appear as three dimensional as brocade.

Linen and cotton are usually worn as under clothes due to their lightweight and breathable properties, they are also used for pants. = flax fibers and cotton plant

Silk is usually worn as some form of overwear due to it reflecting light and expensive manufacture. = Silkworms cocoon

Velvet is usually used for clothing padding, or pants. = special loom usually with silk although linen, cotton and wool can be used

Cashmere is used for thin over clothes and usually only for decoration. = cashmere goats

Wool is used rarely and if it is it is used as padding in colder climate, so something you have in between your under and over clothes. It is also and important aspect of the military later in Beleriand as it is easy to get and you stay warm even in rain. = hair of animals (sheep, goats, cows, dogs, etc)

Rayon is used a lot by the Noldor too as it is easier to get than silk and hold a more stable temorature. Rayon is usually chosen for a pieces of clothes that requires a lot of embroidery silk wouldn´t be able to hold or as a tunic. = wood pulp

Notes on dyes:

Dyed clothes can be categorised in two; cheap home dyed fabrics, with local based dyes and expensive professional dyed fabrics, coloured with imported and expensive ingredients. The more clearer a colour the wealthier. - the colour mentioned here is what I draw him in.

White although not seemingly much is expensive due to the ingrediency being hard to obtain and not something you just get shipped to you, it shows wealth as the common folk of the Noldo really uses it and are more drown to easy colourful clothes instead, it also symbolises purity as it absorbs colours better than any other dyes. - Easy = sun bleaching (never really white white more like a pale yellow or brown) Expensive = chemical help Black requires the fibres to be dyed repeatedly therefore, it is also a symbol of wealth, although it is less eye catching which also makes it the colour for humility and plainness. Black fabrics also holds the shortes amount of times if dyed with alum. - Expensive = mix of the basic dyes: (madder, weld and woad, alum), acorns, galnuts, oak apple Yellow/gold although and easy colour to obtain is still a colour used by the elite as it can represent gold as a heraldic colour. - Easy and mild yellow = tansy, goldenrod, birch leaves and wild chervil Expensive and satured yellow = turmeric, saffron, onion skin, marigold, chamomile Red/Scarlet is at times some of the most expensive due to the material used to get a scarlet red. Easy still expensive but cheaper = madder root (the root are harvested once a year - the leaf are harvested the whole year but gives a slightly different colour - madder can also give pink), brazilwood (can also make pink and purple) Expensive = raisin dragonsblood, kermes, scale insects Purpel/violet is at times more expensive than gold due to the ingredients. - Easy = kermes and alum Expensive = dog whelk

So yeah... out from all this I make my designs...

[astroismypassion]

Astrology observations🧑‍🎄🎄🧑‍🎄

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

🎄 Scorpio in the 12th house, Mars in the 12th house and Aries over the 12th house natives often crave salty foods late in the evening.

🧑‍🎄 12th house also shows what you are like and like to do before bed or right before falling asleep.

Aries over the 12th house: getting into an argument right before going to bed, light work out, drinking a hot drink, you probably take extra care on your skin on your face especially

Taurus over the 12th house: eating before bed (especially sweets and fruits), preparing clothes for the next day, you probably have a very set bed time routine, drinking a cup of tea, putting on lip balm, listening to music

Gemini over the 12th house: journaling before bed, sending a message to your siblings, a close friend, scrolling on social media, reading a book or news, watching a documentary or news on TV, putting on hand cream, watering the plants, doodling, listening to a podcast

Cancer over the 12th house: spending time with your family members, especially mum, watching movies, eating something home cooked, looking through your photo album on your phone, drinking hot cocoa, warm bath or spending extra time in the shower, listening to music, texting your close friends/family members, using body lotion, drinking a glass of warm milk

Leo over the 12th house: spending time on your hobbies, interests, texting your crush, brushing your hair, warm bath before bed, listening to music

Virgo over the 12th house: reading before bed, reading the news, going through your planner, planning activities for the next day, journaling, gratitude journal, watering plants, doodling/drawing before bed, listening a podcast, stretching, yoga, watching animal videos

Libra over the 12th house: eating before bed (sweets, fruits), doing self-care (putting on a mask) or washing off make up, picking clothes for the next day, putting on night cream, putting on body lotion, putting on lip balm, drinking a cup of tea, colouring a colour book

Scorpio over the 12th house: light work out before bed, meditation, masturbation lol, drinking a hot drink, shaving, you like to be on your own in your room

Sagittarius over the 12th house: reading (but in a foreign language), watching a documentary, eating foreign food, putting on a sleep mask, using Duolingo and practising a language,

Capricorn over the 12th house: going through your planner for the next day, spending time with dad before bad, scrolling through social media, talking to your parents, drinking warm water with lemon, taking more time on your dental hygene

Aquarius over the 12th house: sending a good night message, stalking other people online lol, reading about astrology, guided meditation for sleep, putting on sock because you’re probably cold, charging your phone and other devices, spending time on your tablet

Pisces over the 12th house: watching a film directly in your bed, reading pick a card/tarot readings, watching anime, animated films or cartoons, conscious breathing exercises, guided meditation for sleep, putting on socks, yoga, stretching

🎄 You might not be as compatible as you think with other signs of the same modality as yours. So if you are a Cancer Sun, you might not get along so great, especially in partnerships, with Aries, Libra, Capricorn Sun, so other Cardinal signs. Same goes for Fixed signs, if you’re a Taurus Sun you could not get along that great with Aquarius, Leo, Scorpio Sun, since both might be too dominant and wanting to lead.

🧑‍🎄 When there is Moon conjunct Venus in Synastry, the Venus person tends to lead and the Moon person follows, because they let go off control due to feeling safe around Venus person.

🎄 I noticed the person most likely wanting to marry you has their personal planets (especially Sun) conjunct your Jupiter sign and not the other way around. So if you have Taurus Jupiter in your own Natal chart, Taurus Suns might most likely want to marry you, but it could also mean you might not necessarily want to marry them or see them as your ideal partner. If you have Aquarius Jupiter this doesn’t always mean you will want to marry an Aquarius Sun, but they might be the one wanting to marry you.

🧑‍🎄 You might consider someone your life partner or wanting to marry them if your Jupiter falls into their 1st house in Synastry. You might really see a future with them and this has potential for a long-term commitment.

🎄 Ex partners are most likely to describe you by your Moon sign after a break up. For example if you have Aries Moon in your Natal chart, your ex could describe you as “unsupportive”.

🧑‍🎄 When there is Sun conjunct Saturn in Synastry the connection could ver much feel “right person, wrong time”.

🎄 8th house shows your desires, 12th house your hopes, desires for the future, 11th house shows aspirations and Ascendant shows the pursuit of your innermost desires.

🧑‍🎄 People who have Moon conjunct Venus in their Natal chart often attract a romantic partner with Cancer Moon or Taurus over the 4th house.

🎄 Capricorn Rising might since childhood transform every hobby into a full-time career. For example, if they loved writing as a child or journaling, they might become an author as an adult.

🧑‍🎄 Cancer Suns really judge a person’s character based on what feeling the person gives them. So based on how they feel around you.

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

[wingedpeanutgentlemen]

I am Moatasem Ahmed from the Gaza Strip. This is what the war did to my children. We bear the blame for these children’s escape from certain death. What about their homes and everything they own? They have become unsafe and do not enjoy a decent life after our house was destroyed. We became homeless and displaced from the north to the south. My family, my elderly mother and I do not have anything to support my children, such as clothes, food and clean water. We took refuge in refugee camps. We suffered and were displaced from place to place. Because of the high prices, we cannot provide water and food for our children. We tried to escape death outside the Strip, but we could not because of the high cost of travel, which costs from 7 to 9 thousand dollars per person. We are a family of 6 people. Therefore, we address those with a living conscience and good positions to help and support you in creating a better life for me and my family. Your generous support and donation will help provide the basic needs necessary for my family. To donate via the link 🇵🇸💔🥺

https://www.gofundme.com/f/gaza-familys-journey-to-hope?modal=share&source=fundraiser+story

[heylittleriotact]

but hidden in his coat is an orange right hand

Here it is. The most unserious thing I've ever written: Emmrich has the day off and Rook is at work. He decides to tidy her apartment for her, but gets distracted by the laundry. He borrows her lotion, and chaos ensues.

@aldisobey - I dedicate this to you with all of my love. This is in every way, in every fucked up word, for You <3

Read below or on ao3

It had all started out so innocently: Rook left for work, and he had the day off. He might have gone home, but with the automatic feeder for Manfred set up to be controlled with an app on his phone, Emmrich decided that loitering around Rook’s small apartment for the day would be a nice change of pace.

By noon he’d washed and put away the sink full of dishes, watered her houseplants, and made a trip to the grocery store to replenish her cupboards.

After vacuuming the carpet in the living room (how was there so much cat fur? She didn’t even own a cat), he changed the record on her turntable (the Velvet Underground and Nico was swapped for Cohen’s ‘I’m Your Man’), and decided to start on her bedroom: there was nothing like coming home to a tidy house, and there was no denying Rook’s well-lived in space was in need of tending.

He’d been partway through picking up the not insignificant amount of clothing on the floor, and depositing it into the duct-taped plastic laundry basket he fully intended to take down to the communal laundry room in the basement, when he found himself staring at the dark blue panties sitting atop a Motörhead t-shirt that he’d just placed in the basket.

They were just panties. They weren’t even her most alluring pair: these were plain modal fabric, free of lace or cut-outs or suggestive designs.

Yet he stared — and for a good deal longer than he had any reason to.

These were what she had worn to bed the night before after she’d emerged from the shower. She had cuddled up against him, fingers scratching lazily through his chest hair, falling into a deep easy sleep at least a full hour before sleep found him too.

It had been a long day for both of them, and neither had the energy to make love the night before. He liked that about this particular place in their relationship: it wasn’t that he didn’t relish every single opportunity he had to make her legs shake, but there was an ease about their day-to-day interactions after so many months of being together that was effortless and simple. No longer was every spare moment spent wrapped around each other as if it may be their last, but instead their lust had established mature roots until it became a comfortable - but ever-present - option instead of a necessity.

For reasons he couldn’t explain, however, Rook’s worn panties balled up innocently in the laundry basket had his heart racing and blood rushing below his waistline faster than he could say ‘pervert.’

How they’d ended up in his hand was a mystery to him, even as he swallowed hard and brought them to his nose, feeling sinful as he inhaled. His cock throbbed receptively as the familiar scent of her mingled with her body wash and laundry detergent flooded his olfactory receptors.

He moaned softly into the mid-afternoon silence of Rook’s bedroom, and surrendered himself with surprisingly little shame to what his body was implying it should do: it was only natural to feel called to see to oneself from time to time, after all.

Undoing his belt with one hand, he dropped onto his side of Rook’s bed, pushing up his cashmere pullover and unzipping his pants in one efficient motion.

He realized then that the bottle of lube was still in its most recently utilized location, which was the bathroom. Did he really want to hold his pants up and shuffle all that way to get it?

Deciding he’d rather not, his eyes landed on a nondescript bottle of lotion perched on Rook’s bedside table behind the ashtray. Figuring that plain old Jergens was good enough for him when he was a young man, it would most certainly do in a pinch now.

Setting the panties down atop the bulge in his underwear, he reached over the bed and pumped a generous palmful of lotion into his left hand and leaned back into his pillow, careful not to get any on his clothes or the sheets.

The panties were picked up again, and he fished his cock out of his briefs as he savoured the softness of her intimates under his thumb.

Rook… oh… even when he could have her whenever he liked, the thrill never wore off — never diminished to anything less than absolute…

His cock throbbed under his fingers and he let out a low groan as he worked the room-temperature lotion over his hot length. He dragged his teeth over his lower lip, uttering another indulgent moan through them as he lifted the hand gripping the panties again so he could steal another lungful of all that was her.

Everything. She was everything. His life could be defined as little more than banal purgatory before she’d graced it: elevator music and beige everything - endlessly waiting for something, though no one could tell him what.

Oh how he loved her… craved her… needed her…

He set a well-practiced pace, confident in his understanding of his body as his slick hand glided up and down his cock, the lewd sounds of his pleasure accompanying his deep, heavy breaths.

If only she could see: if only she could witness for herself the monumental effect that she had on him, reducing him - an accomplished and successful man of his age - to little more than a horny adolescent, unable to make it through a single afternoon without a furious and passionate wank...

He whined into the cotton against his face, completely lost in the ghostly sweetness of her mesmerizing cunt that had been in contact with the scant clothing only hours earlier.

Maker how lovely it would be if it was actually her cunt against his lips instead…

He’d spread her open like the pages of a lurid book, taking his time - as one should in a beautiful garden - to bury his nose within her perfect bloom; graze upon her with all the gentle innocence of a new fawn nibbling upon the delicate meadow flax of springtime…

She’d whisper his name first: a breathy, flattered little exclamation that would give way to rich moans from deep within the very core of her as her thighs shuddered against his ears and her hips arced upwards…

‘Ohhhh…’ she would sigh, deliriously, deliciously undone. ‘Oh Emmrich - I’m going to cum…’

‘Come for me, darling,’ he would say then. ‘Wash over me like a wave on a cruel summer day, and I shall be the happiest man who ever was - with your dew upon my lips, and the dream that I might yet savour your sweetness, even with my very last breath...’

His hips jerked and he fucked into his clenched hand, his breaths falling from his lips in frenzied bursts as his toes curled into the bedsheets.

He came with a ragged groan, feeling his hot spend pulse out of him and drip steadily down his greasy fingers, pooling on his exposed belly and pubic hair.

Reposed on the bed, he waited until the lightheadedness subsided and his vision cleared, the hand holding the navy blue panties that had been his undoing falling to his side as he swallowed thickly and took stock of the situation: he was laying in his girlfriend’s bed at three o’clock on a Tuesday, covered in lotion and his own cum while she was at work and a half-full laundry basket of clothes sat forgotten on the floor.

She very well may be the death of me…

Confident again in his ability to stand, Emmrich hastily cleaned himself up with the panties, feeling somewhat guilty about soiling them so vulgarly despite their impending date with the washing machine. They were dropped in the laundry basket and he tucked himself back into his pants and refastened his belt before making his way to the bathroom to wash the remnants of cum and lotion off his hand.

Certain he had his wits about him once more, he deposited a few more pieces of clothing into the basket, then hoisted it under his arm, grabbing the laundry detergent and a handful of quarters from the bowl by the front door and whistling a jaunty tune as he descended to the laundry room.

It was about an hour or so later when he was dusting Rook’s dresser that it first occurred to him that something was amiss.

Initially he thought the strange hue of his left palm might be merely a late afternoon shadow filtering in the nicotine-tinted window, but when he set down the Swiffer duster in his right hand and the rabbit shaped piggy bank he’d been dusting underneath, it became abundantly clear that was not the case.

“Uhhh…”

He inspected his left hand — the palm of which was now a vivid copper-orange. Aggressive brown stains lingered on the sides of his fingers and the skin between them, collecting gaudily at the edges of his many rings.

“Oh,” he whimpered, horrible, damning realization settling upon him. “Oh no.”

He cleared the distance to Rook’s nightstand in two long steps, stumbling over her vanity chair in his fervour, and snatched the bottle of duplicitous lotion from its innocent place, holding it up to read the label.

The words ‘natural glow’ imprinted themselves upon his brain in cruel confirmation, and he made a sound like a pelican gargling a bowling ball, fingers tightening around the damnable bottle.

Self-tanner. Why in the name of all that is precious and sane does Rook have a bottle of self-tanner next to her bed? She’s as white as the freshly driven snow! She gets sunburn if she stands close to a window at mid-day for too long!

Why? — WHY?!—

— Horrified and already knowing what awaited him, Emmrich slammed the bottle of lotion down and hooked his thumb into the waistband of his pants, pulling them away from his body far enough to dimly make out his mortifyingly ‘sun-kissed’ dick, nestled in his underwear.

Time. He needed time to figure this out.

He looked at his watch: 4:17. Rook was finished work at 5:00 if no last minute First Calls wandered into the chapel, and Pemberly was a twelve minute drive from her apartment…

He forced himself to take a deep breath.

I have time. I can sort this out with time to spare, surely. Perhaps it hasn’t really had time to develop fully. A shower — yes, a shower is in order…

He was already halfway to the bathroom — sweater yanked off and discarded on the floor, his pants undone for the second time that afternoon — though this time for a much different reason.

This wasn’t as simple as correcting the colouring of a jaundiced cadaver with a few ounces of extra red colourant added to the embalming fluid and some clever cosmetics: this chemical was sunk into the outer layers of his skin, and cosmetizing a penis was no small feat: hiding this from Rook was not going to be an option — he needed to scour the tanner from his person before she got home.

Hopping into the bathtub like a startled doe, Emmrich cranked the faucet, not waiting for the water to heat up (which took no less than forty seconds in Rook’s shower) before standing directly under the frigid water and squirting a full palmful of her grapefruit and neroli body wash into his hand and working it into the briefest of lathers before applying it directly to his nethers.

He coated himself liberally, sudsy fingers slipping over his soft cock, panic mounting as every swath of skin revealed as he worked the soap around was still stubbornly orange.

“Nnnngh!”

He lifted his left hand and held it inches from his face, scrubbing his palm and fingers with his right.

I have to go to work tomorrow… what will people think of a supposedly ‘dignified’ mortician with only one hand suspiciously orange? Ohhhhhh—

“Please!” He begged the obstinate beauty product, as if it would do him any good.

Something else, perhaps…

He glanced around the shower: Rook didn’t use shower poufs or loofahs or anything he could solidly scrub himself with, but…

The pot of body scrub in the corner practically waved at him and he dropped the lid on the floor of the bathtub in his haste to access the contents within.

Three minutes and as much ‘gentle’ exfoliation as his cock could handle later, Emmrich abandoned the idea: it hadn’t helped - perhaps smoothed out some of the patchiness and the brown borders on his fingers, but it had done depressingly little to actually purge the stain from his skin.  

He turned the water off and got out of the shower, parsing his remaining options, settling finally upon the communal knowledge of the internet to hopefully get him out of this predicament.

Vinegar, baking soda, lemon juice - even toothpaste. He tried them all, and with time running out, nothing helped. In fact, the lemon juice might have even made it worse, and now he smelled like a middle-school science project to boot.

It wasn’t that he thought Rook would be disturbed or upset - quite the opposite: she would be delighted. She might never stop laughing.

She might never take him seriously again.

Who could take a man with an orange cock seriously?

He could just leave, he supposed. Text her and tell her that he forgot that he had plans that evening and he wouldn’t be able to see her until tomorrow when hopefully he could figure a way out of this mess…

“What 'plans?'” He asked himself sardonically: Rook knew better. He did too.

All he could do was act as normally as possible and hope that she wouldn't notice. It wouldn't be too difficult, would it? He was right-handed, and could conceal his left easily enough, and there was no real reason she would need to see him naked at any point in the evening. Even if they found themselves in an amorous mood, waiting until the lights were off before undressing would be easy enough. Indeed... with some cunning and carefully controlled lighting, he very well could get away with this without Rook being any the wiser... 

The folly of his plan became apparent a short time later when Rook walked in the door to her pristinely clean apartment and looked around from the entryway, eyes wide, mouth slightly agape, before whispering, "Y-you cleaned my apartment for me?"  

He had barely opened his mouth to respond by the time Rook had dumped her backpack on the doormat and shed her jacket in a pile behind her, clearing distance between them with baffling ease and all but tackling him onto the worn couch, her weight - familiar and warm settling against him as her lips met his in an enthusiastic - and deep - kiss.  

"You spent your day off cleaning my apartment?" She breathed, straddling his thigh, her breasts pressing against him, "Why did you do that?"

Knowing where this was going as she nuzzled into his neck and slipped a hand past the hem of his sweater and up over his abdomen, he scrambled to redirect her.

"I-it was nothing, darling - I thought it might be a good way to pass the ti– TIME!"

He yelped when her hand redirected itself instead - directly into his pants, her fingers cool against his flaccid cock.

"I love you," she purred against his neck, her silken palm curving around his softness in a way his own hand never could. "I love you, I love you, I love you – you didn't have to..."

"No, but I wanted to – you know how I operate, dear."

If only he hadn't been enchanted by her panties...

She placed a sucking kiss against his neck, slowly moving her hand within his pants, "Thank you..."

"You're welcome, darling, b-but you needn't..." he swallowed and debated extracting her hand. "Reciprocate."

"But what if I want to?" She breathed against his ear, and he could hear her smile and smell her lipstick: a shiver stroked up his spine – he twitched in her hand.

Oh... the things she did... the way she did them...

His head hit the arm of the couch with a resigned 'thud' as she continued to lick and nibble his earlobe.

“Are you hungry?” He inquired, searching for a way out of this despite his conviction that waned with each stroke of her perfect hand. “L-let me — ohh… let me take you out for dinner — we can go anywhere you’d like.”

Yes — if he could get her out of the apartment…

"Sure..." she murmured, though to his dismay she continued her business within his trousers, grinding herself lazily against his thigh. "But first, an amuse-bouche."

He felt her hand leave his cock and flip the tongue of his belt free from the buckle.

"Wouldn't you rather wait?!" Emmrich half-screeched, catching her wrist before she could undress him further.

Rook sat up, hand still on his belt, his cock straining visibly against the front of his pants. Her eyes left his, wandering pointedly to the bulge between them. "Would you?"

"N-no of course not–" he babbled. "– it's only that, you see – I simply think that – if we only–"

She took advantage of his scramble for an explanation and batted his hand away from hers, easily undoing the rest of his buckle and fly, with a coquettish laugh. "You're being weird, babe. You never turn down a blow– oh!" His cock was in her hand again, bronze tint contrasting garishly with her pale, pale fingers.

Frowning, she studied him, then said, all business: "Emmrich, why is your dick orange?"

Blood rushed to his ears and cheeks. "Why do you have self-tanning lotion on your bedside table?!"

The frown wavered, twitched, then gave way to a disbelieving grin as Rook clearly put the pieces together in her mind.

"Did... did you...? No way..." an amused titter slipped past her lips. "Did you jerk off with self-tanner?"

"I fail to see the humour in this," Emmrich muttered reproachfully.

"Maker's tits, you did!" She was laughing properly now: just like he knew she would... now she was unlikely to ever stop.

"Well why would you leave it next to your bed?" He snapped, trying to sit up, but Rook had him pinned. "You don't even use tanning lotion!"

"No–-" she gasped, "– but at one point I thought I might, so I bought a bottle. That was years ago though. I used it maybe twice."

He wanted to grab her arms and shake her: it was all so funny now, but after a week of this, the novelty of a boyfriend with orange genitals might wear thin.

"I look ridiculous!"

"Yeah," she agreed, wiping tears from the corners of her eyes. She slipped down the couch, resting on her belly and putting her face close to the offending reproductive organ, "But you know what, handsome?"

He sighed, wishing for nothing more than to be enveloped by a black hole. "What?"

"I still love you anyway." The words washed over him, body and soul: hot, breathy, and utterly honest.

How had he found himself so fortunate? So blessed?

His breath caught when her tongue dragged up the underside of his length, flicking against the crown of his cock.

"Why does it taste like peppermint?" She inquired in a soft whisper from between his legs, licking him again, stroking him in tandem.

He chanced a look down – saw her looking up at him, the lust in her grey eyes tempered by that benign curiosity he loved so much.

"T-toothpaste..." he confided. "The... the Google suggested it might uh... lighten it. As you can see, it didn't work..."

She didn't call him an idiot for thinking it would. Didn't laugh at his foolish desperation.

Instead, she pressed her lips ever-so-sweetly against the tip of his cock, and they parted in a breathtaking smile.

He loved her. He loved her more than life itself. He would truly give anything to see that smile every day for the rest of their lives...

His Rook. His kind, enchanting, joyful Rook. Non-judgemental and compassionate – a marvelous woman by all definitions.

How foolish he was to think that she would be anything but understanding about this silly faux pas...

He had been just about to tell her that when she placed his cock against the corner of her mouth, and said in the nasally imitation of a beloved cartoon character, "Ehhh... what's up, Doc?" –

– and then proceeded to give him the best blowjob of his life.

[mothmothm0th]

so what's a moth do? all entities perform some role in the ecosystem of Meaning and Metaphor and yet one might be forgiven for thinking a moth has none, that it is a floating signifier. of course this ignores how the very name "empty spaces" is a deliberate invocation of the floating signifier which is then subverted by the presence of Meaning. look, I'm a moth. I'm just saying words. what I'm getting at here is empty spaces is like a food web. dolls feed on witches, who feed on angels who feed on the grace of princesses... it's something like that I'm sure. defined by relations and modalities, there aren't really any real outsiders in our space, except for the outsiders. but the moth doth seem an exception in the broth. we just stare at candles all day, eat doll clothes and lie, right? false. fake news. it didn't happen. moths are important!

see, okay. you understand what a food web is. it's like one of those maps where the dolls eat clockwork to become mirror images and I'm just repeating myself here. my point is, in a food web you find in a natural ecosystem, everything winds back with the decomposers, the detritivores. and they get a bad rap. would I love you if you were a worm? of course! you're a vital part of ensuring the ecosystem survives! we'd be kindred spirits! yeah that's right, moths are the worms of the spaces which aren't. right? a moth eats dead cognition and semiotics like a detritivore eats dead matter.

prime example: an angel's halo is always already dead. dead as faith. dead as grace. worn with guilt and self-delusion. for the angel, a death sentence. for a moth, a banquet. you should let a moth eat your halo. let me do it. but these dead things lie about everywhere. if you find your clothes moth-eaten, it's because a mothh thought you weren't wearing it anymore. if a moth's gaze burns away a thought from your mind, or maybe scrambles it a little, then clearly you didn't need that thought or that particular cognitive framing. so, be thankful!

the weight of yearning chips away at the self, and like erosion does it scoop all the human bits out. a moth might be what happens when a person becomes a mere shell becomes a chrysalis hatches into an echo but that doesn't mean the decay of being is bad! i, a moth, have helped dozens of small to medium sized systems restructure their cognitive finances by eliminating false consciousnesses and bad framework habits. it's just an instinct, and you know what they say, a moth is a kind of instinct. see, to Shaun-Bowl Satnav, consciousness is a lil ball of Being wrapped in a shell of nothingness, like a dumpling of sorts. you hollow out the dumpling, and you get a doll. but if the dumpling gets more stuffing added in and removed at a rate that yes, that's closer to what a moth isn't. got it? I'm hungry.

so, you put something in the dumpling-isn't-moth, it gets mangled up and you take psychic damage, and the something decays into something more nutritional maybe. I mean it makes sense, right? what else would nourish an empty space but a lack? unless you're a witch and I'm eating your hat. but you deserved that. in your case it's the dolls that are nourished which goes against my point. maybe I'm bad at writing clearly.

but that's also the point isn't it? yknow, being contradictory, saying nonsense mixed with just enough ideas that sort of make sense that youre compelled to take me at least a little seriously. it's like being in a mouth and the fluffy nonsense is my tongue jostling you about and the smart ideas are teeth like knives that tear into your preconceptions and held ideas and so too is an old you consumed and from the confusion and discombobulation emerges a newer moth-eaten you, a pruned you. a better you? gosh maybe.

anyway also sometimes a moth just says things. but if its words still eat at you, that's normal. you're normal! worry about it

[minefield-of-a-ninja]

*image of Jensen Ackles is used with permission of the photographer Mandi Lea Photogtaphy.

Summary for this chapter: Brandy learns more than she cares to know about BJ, and someone loses a bet.

Characters in this chapter: Brandy Miller x Soldier Boy, Kimiko Miyashiro (via text), Annie January, Hughie Campbell, mentions Donna January and Reggie Franklin (A-Train)

Warnings/tags in this chapter: 18+ ONLY, explicit sexual content, rough sex, hair-pulling, 

Words in this chapter: 3,600

Author’s notes: Sorry, I didn't have the patience to make one of those text image things, so I just screenshot my google doc.

This fills my #Someone Loses A Bet square for @jacklesversebingo 

Many thanks @stunudo @talltalesandbedtimestories @bigmouthlass for the pre-reads and reassurance that I'm not a terrible storyteller.

SPOTIFY PLAYLIST - key songs this chapter: “Ball and Biscuit” by The White Stripes, “Closer” by Kings of Leon, “Do I Wanna Know?” by Arctic Monkeys, and “Beck + Call” by July Talk and Tanya Tagaq

CHAPTER TWO: Someone Loses A Bet

What surprises me most about Captain BJ is the way he helps me out of the chair and crouches at my feet to wrangle the twisted denim and modal from around my knees. When I take over to put my clothes back in place, he lingers, fingertips tracing the edges of my underwear. 

I hold back a shiver and cross the room to the sink. My curls are a mess, cheeks ruddy, and lips swollen. When I look up, he’s looming large behind me in the mirror’s reflection. He holds my focus as he leans forward, reaching around both sides of my ribcage to turn the tap on hot.

“Happy Birthday to you,” he quietly sings the song adopted by hand washers across the globe during a pandemic as he lathers and rinses his hands. I stare, buzzing from the reality of having two orgasms with a man I barely know but can’t stand to speak to, and the heat of his broad, solid chest curling against my shoulders.

He twists the knobs off and shakes the excess water from his hands with a slow, sly smile. His eyelids hang heavy just as his irises shine like polished jade. I try to catch my breath as he stands up straight, reaching for a paper towel to dry his hands. 

“See ya back at the ranch, Applejack,” he murmurs, tossing the wadded-up towel into the waste basket before exiting the small room.

+++

I haven’t seen or heard from him in two weeks, but now that I know him, I dream about him more. He still talks — says things that make me furious and hot, but I’m less afraid of myself for getting off on them. 

And I daydream, too.

I imagine taking my time with him. I breathe him in and run my fingers across his broad, bare chest and shoulders. I envision his skin, the skin I’ve only seen peeks of and barely touched, as a sunkissed patchwork of freckles, scars, and tattoos, sheathing an exquisite frame of muscle and bone. I fantasize about lacing our fingers and pressing our palms together, mine smaller and softer than I ever realized compared to his so large and calloused. 

These kinds of fantasies are new and frivolous for me. He’s a bodice-ripper and a pleasure giver, mean and so good at everything he does. I’ve never been one to gather wool, but nothing about me or my way of life is like it used to be these days. 

My phone buzzes on the table beside my laptop, startling me. I look down to see a text from Kimiko.

My friend Kimiko knows me well, and she doesn’t let me hide. If she weren’t so sincere, it would piss me off when she calls me out. Instead, I open to her like a crocus to sunlight.

I don’t know what possesses me, but I hesitate to agree to dinner with my best friends. My first thought is of him and what if I see him and what if we hook up again and what if...

+++

Annie and Hughie invite me out to Butcher’s again. It’s nice to be included and to have something to take my mind off BJ.

Unfortunately, Annie talks a lot about him

“You know, babe, maybe Brandy doesn’t want to spend her night hearing about a person she doesn't even know.” 

Hughie has a point.

“I’m sorry, Brandy.” Annie clasps my hand. “Let’s talk about something other than Benjamin James Davis III for once.”

“The third? There’s three of them?!” I laugh, but I’m honestly intrigued. Apart from learning and seeing physical evidence that BJ has a son himself, it never occurred to me that my enigmatic and evasive neighbor and one-time hookup wasn’t a product of a government science experiment gone terribly wrong — like a test tube Marlboro Man 1950s throwback.

Hughie sighs and playfully glares at Annie. “He’s the third of that name, but I wouldn’t say he’s one of them.”

“I see, so even they don’t like him,” I laugh again, refilling my pint glass from the pitcher.

“His dad quasi-disowned him when he enlisted in the Marines. He wanted him to take over the steel business, told him he was a fucking disappointment.” Annie looks somber and slightly apologetic.

I scoff. “Most people are proud of their kids for fighting for their country, or scared, but disappointed? Wow.”

I look at Hughie who is still glaring at Annie in no longer a playful manner.

Annie clears her throat and pushes away from the table. “I’ll go get a refill.”

Once she’s out of earshot, Hughie lowers his voice and leans in.

“Bottom line is, he’s not a good guy. It doesn’t matter why. Annie and her mom Donna worked for the Davises. She grew up in that house after they kicked BJ out. To this day, Donna talks about BJ — or Tripp,” Hughie rolls his eyes, “as the family calls him — like he’s the second coming, so sometimes Annie takes things personally. She still has a lot of grief work out.”

That was a lot of information that I was not prepared to absorb. I blink and nod. “Sounds like it, yeah. Poor Annie.”

“OK,” Annie returns, setting the pitcher and a tray of popcorn on the table. “And I got M&Ms. Reggie popped us a fresh batch of popcorn so it’s still hot. The M&Ms’ll get all melty!”

Hughie relaxes into his chair and grins, watching Annie shake a package of M&Ms over the hot popcorn. I chuckle and sip my beer.

+++ 

I absently scroll Instagram as I climb the dim stairs to my condo, startled by a presence at the top. 

When I switch on the stairwell light, BJ’s sitting on the boot bench that separates my condo from Maggie’s across the hall, bent elbows balanced on spread knees and hands clasped. He’s unmoving except for the lopsided smirk that balances the sharpness of his eyes.

I pocket my phone and return the smirk. “You do love the element of surprise, don’t you?” I take the last steps to my door.

He chuckles as he slowly stands, and I type in my doorcode. The lock slides, I open the door, and he follows me inside.

I shrug out of my jacket and hang it and my bag on the hooks just inside the door. He silently lets the door shut behind him and waits for me to move further inside.

I didn’t invite him. I don’t know why he’s here. Scratch that — he’s here because somehow he knows I want him here. What I don’t know is how he knows what I want.

“Drink?” I ask, ducking into my galley kitchen for something to calm the sudden burst of nerves. 

Annie’s and Hughie’s info dump is still floating unsorted in my mind. I didn’t need or want any of that intel. In my experience, a person doesn’t go to war, have a kid, never speak of a wife, become a military contractor, and suddenly become Love and Light in their 40s. Especially not with the family history I learned about tonight. 

He doesn’t answer, so I look at him. 

He’s staring me down but nods once. I grab a couple of short tumblers and a bottle of Jameson before skating between his body and the door jamb to head over to the couch.

“So,” I pause to set our glasses on the table and fill them, then kick off my Vans and burrow into one end of the couch with my drink. “Where’ve you been?”

I assume he’s been on a mission. I’ve done enough document work for the government to get a grasp of what he does when he isn’t around.

BJ purses his lips as he bends to scoop his glass from the table and takes a swig. After a moment, he replies. “I didn’t come here to talk, Brandy.”

I nod. “Then what’d you come here to do?”

This is a dumb ass question on my part, but part of me wants him to say it.

He sighs. “I had a long, hard couple of weeks, and just want to relax.” He turns and sits in a very unrelaxed fashion on the edge of my sofa.

“So we’re drinking in silence. Got it.”

He half-shrugs and downs his whiskey before setting the glass back on the table. “We could do more than drink in silence.” 

He looks at me, tension straining his eyes, his brow, and the breadth of his shoulders. 

“You came here to take your frustrations out on me? That’s neighborly.”

He arches a brow. “You’re the one who shoved me into a chair before unceremoniously climbing on my dick, so I could say the same for you.”

I scowl into my glass. “That was...” My words trail off.

“Was? What?”

“I thought it was a one-time thing.”

He tilts his head. “Did you?”

“Well, I didn’t plan on this.”

I didn’t. I’m not making a lot of plans these days. I am truly at the mercy of my gut, and I don’t hate it.

He sighs and leans toward me to take my half-empty glass and set it next to his on the table. “Whatever this is, planned or not, you want it. We don’t need to talk about it.”

He’s closer than before, leaning into me, waiting. I can feel his tension vibrating me. And I do want it. I want him. Because I’m a grown woman who is having what feels like an existential crisis. I’m trying to make mistakes to jolt myself out of a malaise for Christ’s sake.

“Come on, Applejack,” he mutters, drawing lazy circles on the worn knee of my jeans.

I pitch forward to pull my sweater over my head and toss it into the armchair beside the couch, revealing my bodysuit, and reach for him. 

But he’s faster. He hooks one hand under one of my knees and pulls, opening my thighs and dragging me to my back so he can cradle his hips in the opening. I drag my nails up his side under his Henley as he settles over me, dipping in to press kisses to my throat and jaw.

His bare skin is hot, and his muscles are rigid. He sighs and groans into my neck, sliding a hand underneath to arch it and lifting to nip and suck my collarbones.

We don’t talk. He’s a man of action, after all, but my brain is having a hard time reconciling Dream BJ with Real BJ and the stories of Tripp. Dream BJ never shuts up. Dream BJ says filthy, degrading things. Real BJ uses his mouth in other ways. I don’t know anything about Tripp.

He reaches between us to pop the button on my jeans, pulls my zipper down, and pushes his hand inside to cup my pussy, groaning and shuddering as he rubs and fingers at the crotch of my bodysuit. Then he unsnaps the gusset with a hum. 

The thick pads of his fingers separate my folds to slide over and around my clit while his other hand fists and twists my curls. When he tugs, it sends a shockwave of pleasure from my scalp to my toes. 

I shout and buck my hips. I’m so wet, and he’s so sure. He licks his lips and looks down between us to watch me fuck against his hand. His fingers slip inside, and I hiss. 

“Good girl,” he whispers, watching, rotating my clit with his thumb. “Fuck my hand. Such a good girl.”

I nod and huff, doing what I’m told. My legs are spread wide, and I have one foot on the floor for leverage as I beg him, “pull my hair again.”

He switches the heel of his hand for his thumb and presses down, pushing himself up and yanking my head back. 

“Oh, god!” My back arches, and I slam against his hand. 

He’s got two fingers tightly curled against my g-spot and keeps my neck painfully arched as he twists my hair and watches me come completely undone.

I’m breathless and sweating as he whirls like a dervish — boots and socks and denim flying, my bodysuit ripped over my head and his henley over his, couch cushions over the back of the couch, condom wrapper opened, and then, he’s inside me. 

He gathers my wrists in one hand above my head and grips one of my hips tight before falling into a cadence. I brace my foot against my coffee table to open myself wider, and he grits his teeth, seething at the ceiling. His grip bruises my hip and wrists, and he’s pounding my pussy so hard I’ll be bruised there as well. 

“Fuck yes,” he breathes, looking back down at me with a frightening edge. “You like it fucking rough, don’t you?”

I breathe and nod, gasping for air. I do. I love it. I always have, but have never had it this good.

He huffs a laugh, slightly shifting his angle, and I holler and convulse. “Right fucking there. Fucking take it. Shit.”

I’m coming again, and his hips stutter and shake.

+++

“Why do you have to make everything sound so crass?”

I grunt to get out from under him.

“I don’t.” He sits up and leans back into the one remaining cusion. “Your tight-ass value system tells you it’s crass.”

I roll my eyes. “You don’t know anything about me.”

“I know more about you than you think. I know what you want. I know what you’re afraid of. I know what you dream about.”

This is why I hate rollercoasters and gambling — it’s the debilitating anxiety from the unknown. And if a rollercoaster were a person, Benjamin James Davis III would be that person.

I get up from our post-coital conversation and wrap myself in a couch throw before walking to the kitchen to fill a couple of glasses with water. When I get back to the couch, he’s lounging nude with a half-hard cock, smoking a cigarette. I was so blinded by what he was doing to me five minutes ago that I didn’t fully acknowledge the completely bare sculpted shoulders, broad, hard chest, and ripples of musculature decorated with scars and ink. Just as I’d imagined so many times.

“I don’t have an ashtray, you asshole,” I say, handing him one of the glasses. He makes a face at the glass and then sets it on the coffee table, drops his lit cigarette into the water, and follows me to my bedroom. 

Once inside, he yanks the throw from around me and drops it to the floor. The cold filtered water from my fridge dispenser splashes my chest, and the glass slips from my hand to join the throw with a soft thud.

He loops an arm around my middle, pulling my back to his chest, and immediately cups and tilts my chin to dip in and capture my lips. The angle should be uncomfortable, but instead, it burns away the final vestiges of my self-consciousness. I’m stripped of shame and second thoughts, and my brain hums with pleasure.

He kisses me, demanding, dominating as one hand drags down my throat to my breasts and the other slides up to splay across my stomach. He pulls my bottom lip between his teeth before nipping along my jaw to my ear. 

He tastes like whiskey and cigarettes, and the soft whiskers of his neatly trimmed beard make me shiver. One hand cups and squeezes my breasts, his fingers pull my nipples taut, and he burrows his face in the crook of my neck.

“You smell like caramel, Applejack. What is that?”

“Are we really talking about perfume? Fuck.”

I push out of his hold and walk around my bed to slide under the covers. He doesn’t get underneath, and he stops me from doing so as he crawls across the bed from the other side, dragging me prostrate before climbing astride my thighs.

“Only brought one condom, but I could go a few more rounds.” He grabs a couple of handfuls of my ass, slowly sliding his thumbs up the seam. “Took the edge off for sure. Let me show you what I can do when I’m less,” he pauses to squeeze and then smack my flesh. “Tense.”

I shake my mess of curls out of the way to look over my shoulder at him. “In the bedside drawer.”

He licks his lips and grins. “Good girl.”

He backs off me, so I take the respite to stretch and twist my spine. I already feel like I’ve gone several rounds with a fucking hurricane. It’s a damn good thing that I work from home because I will not be at the top of any one of my games tomorrow.

After rifling through my drawer, he tosses a strip of three condoms on the bed and then dives face down atop the comforter between my legs. “You smell so good,” he nestles along the insides of my thighs before lightly nosing and kissing my folds. 

I clench the duvet in my fists, and my back arches with an exhale. “I smell like sex and B.O..”

“Yeah, good and fucked and primed for more.” He grips the backs of my thighs tight and opens me wider to swipe the breadth of his tongue against my clit. “Such an easy touch; I’m gonna have you howling at the moon in less than 30 seconds.” 

I roll my eyes, even though I know he’s right. All I have to do is think about him, and I’m on the edge. “You’re so fucking smug.”

He props himself up on his elbows and snags my gaze. “Wanna bet?”

“Bet what?”

“That I can make you scream in less than 30 seconds.”

I’m loud. My ex wasn’t the biggest fan. He thought it was trashy, so I learned how to keep quiet.

I smirk. “What’re the stakes?”

“I win — and I will — I get to fuck your ass.”

I shiver. “OK. And if I win-”

“You won’t.”

“If I win, no kissing.”

He scoffs. “You love my mouth and everything I use it for, Applejack. Why on earth would you not want me to kiss you?”

“You have your terms, and I have mine, Benjamin.”

A wicked grin and edge adorn his handsome face. It should scare me, but it fuels me. He loves kissing. He knows his mouth is a fucking wonderland. But I know mouths can do so many things.

“Deal.” He slowly lowers, and I lie back and stretch out.

One at a time, I drape my knees over his accommodating shoulders. This gives me the advantage I need to move just right. And, god, his mouth really was made for this. 

His hands are everyplace they should be, fingers in and around, tongue lapping and fucking inside. He hugs my thigh to his shoulder, rising to his knees and working a finger inside to crook just right as he sucks my clit between pillowy his lips. 

It is less than 30 seconds when I come, and it’s wet. I squirt and squirm, but I’m quiet about it because I will win this bet. It’s not that I don’t want to know if he can make me come fucking my ass; it’s that, since the moment I met him, I wanted to be on top.

“You little shit,” he says, dropping my knees from his shoulders. “You came so hard and didn't make a fucking sound. I guess I should give you a trophy, but I’m kinda pissed.”

I sit up and shift back, laughing. “Uh-uh, Benny. No kissing, I said so.”

He mutters under his breath as he reaches for one of my ankles and yanks. “Calm down, baby girl, I’m not gonna hurt you. I just want a little taste.”

When he pitches forward, I take advantage of his balance and tackle him, rolling him to his back and climbing on top, reaching for a condom.

“Behave,” I tell him, ripping open the package before rolling the condom over his length and guiding him inside me. “My turn.”

He drops his head to my mattress with arms open wide as I set my pace.

Chapter Three

Series Master List | Other Soldier Boy Fic

What did you think?

[venusianpulp]

Personal Aesthetic -

Through Venus, Moon, Ascendant, Dominant Elements/Modalities

here's a general overview of how your personal aesthetic might be influenced by your Venus sign & house placement. Remember that everyone's preferences and expressions can vary widely, & these descriptions are meant to offer a starting point for exploration. You can go through each section to refer to and create your own harmonious understanding of each nuiance. Each theme will be representative of different aspects of yourself: Venus Sign: This sign represents your artistic tastes, fashion sense, and overall aesthetic preferences.

Venus Signs:

Venus in Aries: Edgy and bold, loves vibrant colors and dynamic styles. Enjoys athletic wear and fashion-forward looks.

Venus in Taurus: Classic and earthy, values comfort and quality. Prefers natural fabrics, earth tones, and timeless pieces.

Venus in Gemini: Eclectic and versatile, enjoys mixing and matching styles. Has a love for trendy accessories and playful colors.

Venus in Cancer: Nostalgic and cozy, prefers soft and comfortable fabrics. May lean towards vintage-inspired or homey aesthetics.

Venus in Leo: Glamorous and attention-grabbing, enjoys statement pieces and bold colors. Loves luxurious materials and dramatic flair.

Venus in Virgo: Neat and refined, appreciates clean lines and practical elegance. Prefers well-organized and polished looks.

Venus in Libra: Harmonious and stylish, values balance and symmetry. Has a penchant for fashion-forward trends and elegant pieces.

Venus in Scorpio: Mysterious and sensual, loves deep and rich colors. Prefers outfits that evoke intensity and allure.

Venus in Sagittarius: Adventurous and eclectic, embraces a global and bohemian aesthetic. Enjoys travel-inspired pieces and bold patterns.

Venus in Capricorn: Timeless and sophisticated, appreciates classic and professional styles. Values high-quality pieces and understated elegance.

Venus in Aquarius: Unique and avant-garde, embraces quirky and unconventional fashion. Enjoys experimental and futuristic looks.

Venus in Pisces: Dreamy and romantic, prefers soft and flowing fabrics. Loves ethereal and fantasy-inspired aesthetics.

Venus House: The house that Venus is located in your natal chart can provide insights into the areas of life where you express your aesthetic preferences.

Venus Houses:

Venus in the 1st House: Personal and attention-grabbing, leans towards a style that showcases individuality and uniqueness.

Venus in the 2nd House: Sensual and luxurious, values quality materials and comfortable yet stylish clothing.

Venus in the 3rd House: Versatile and communicative, enjoys styles that express curiosity and intellectual engagement.

Venus in the 4th House: Nostalgic and cozy, prefers styles that evoke a sense of home and emotional comfort.

Venus in the 5th House: Playful and creative, embraces trends and enjoys fashion as a form of self-expression.

Venus in the 6th House: Practical and polished, prefers clean and organized styles that suit daily routines.

Venus in the 7th House: Harmonious and refined, values balanced and aesthetically pleasing looks.

Venus in the 8th House: Intense and provocative, gravitates towards styles that evoke mystery and allure.

Venus in the 9th House: Adventurous and global, embraces a diverse range of styles and cultural influences.

Venus in the 10th House: Professional and sophisticated, prefers classic and elegant styles suitable for public appearances.

Venus in the 11th House: Eccentric and unique, enjoys fashion that sets them apart and showcases individuality.

Venus in the 12th House: Dreamy and ethereal, prefers styles that evoke a sense of fantasy and spiritual connection.

Moon Sign: Your Moon sign reflects your emotional and inner world, which can also play a role in your aesthetic choices.

Moon Sign:

Moon in Aries: Bold and dynamic aesthetic, drawn to vibrant colors and edgy styles. Enjoys statement pieces and adventurous looks.

Moon in Taurus: Earthy and comfortable aesthetic, values quality fabrics and timeless pieces. Prefers classic and well-fitting styles.

Moon in Gemini: Eclectic and versatile aesthetic, enjoys mixing and matching styles. Loves playful colors and accessories.

Moon in Cancer: Cozy and nostalgic aesthetic, prefers soft and comforting fabrics. Enjoys vintage-inspired and homey styles.

Moon in Leo: Glamorous and attention-grabbing aesthetic, loves bold colors and luxurious materials. Prefers dramatic and eye-catching pieces.

Moon in Virgo: Neat and polished aesthetic, appreciates clean lines and practical elegance. Prefers well-organized and refined styles.

Moon in Libra: Harmonious and refined aesthetic, values balance and symmetry. Enjoys fashion-forward trends and elegant pieces.

Moon in Scorpio: Intense and provocative aesthetic, drawn to deep and rich colors. Prefers styles that evoke mystery and allure.

Moon in Sagittarius: Adventurous and global aesthetic, embraces a diverse range of styles. Enjoys travel-inspired pieces and cultural influences.

Moon in Capricorn: Professional and sophisticated aesthetic, appreciates classic and timeless styles. Values high-quality and understated pieces.

Moon in Aquarius: Unique and unconventional aesthetic, enjoys styles that set them apart. Enjoys experimental and futuristic looks.

Moon in Pisces: Dreamy and romantic aesthetic, prefers soft and flowing fabrics. Loves ethereal and fantasy-inspired styles.

Moon Houses:

Moon in the 1st House: A personal and bold aesthetic that reflects your individuality and presence. Your style makes a statement about who you are.

Moon in the 2nd House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by comfort and quality. You appreciate well-made and tactile pieces.

Moon in the 3rd House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by intellectual engagement and curiosity. You enjoy versatile and communicative styles.

Moon in the 4th House: Nostalgic and homey aesthetic, reflecting emotional comfort and a sense of familiarity.

Moon in the 5th House: Playful and creative aesthetic, embracing fashion as a form of self-expression. Loves to experiment with different looks.

Moon in the 6th House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by practicality and efficiency. You appreciate polished and well-put-together styles.

Moon in the 7th House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by partnerships and harmony. You seek styles that reflect balance and aesthetic cooperation.

Moon in the 8th House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by intensity and depth. You're drawn to styles that evoke mystery and transformation.

Moon in the 9th House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by adventure and exploration. You enjoy styles that embrace cultural diversity and global influences.

Moon in the 10th House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by professionalism and reputation. You gravitate toward classic and sophisticated styles.

Moon in the 11th House: Unique and avant-garde aesthetic, reflecting your individuality and preference for unconventionality.

Moon in the 12th House: Aesthetic preferences are influenced by spirituality and dreaminess. You're drawn to styles that evoke a sense of fantasy and imagination.

Ascendant Sign: This is more about your outward appearance, it can also influence your aesthetic choices. Your Ascendant sign may guide you toward certain fashion trends or styles that align with your projected image.

Ascendant:

Aries Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through bold and energetic styles. They might opt for edgy looks, sporty attire, and vibrant colors to reflect their confident and adventurous personality.

Taurus Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through comfort and elegance. They tend to gravitate towards high-quality materials, classic silhouettes, and earthy tones that showcase their love for luxury.

Gemini Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through versatility and trends. They're likely to experiment with various styles, mixing and matching clothing items, and staying up-to-date with the latest fashion trends.

Cancer Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through a cozy and nurturing approach. They might prefer soft and flowing fabrics, pastel colors, and styles that evoke a sense of emotional connection.

Leo Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic with a touch of drama and glamour. They enjoy attention-grabbing clothing, bold accessories, and styles that allow them to shine and be the center of attention.

Virgo Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through refined and polished looks. They tend to choose clean lines, well-tailored clothing, and subtle details that showcase their attention to detail.

Libra Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through balance and harmony. They often opt for elegant and tasteful clothing, and they pay attention to color coordination and creating a visually pleasing appearance.

Scorpio Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic with intensity and allure. They might gravitate towards bold and provocative styles, dark colors, and clothing that exudes a sense of mystery.

Sagittarius Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through a free-spirited and adventurous approach. They're drawn to eclectic and global styles, embracing a mix of cultural influences and bold patterns.

Capricorn Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through timeless and sophisticated choices. They prefer classic, well-structured clothing that reflects their professionalism and status-conscious nature.

Aquarius Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic with an avant-garde and unique flair. They might gravitate towards unconventional clothing, quirky accessories, and styles that challenge traditional norms.

Pisces Ascendant: Expresses their aesthetic through dreamy and romantic looks. They prefer soft and flowing fabrics, ethereal colors, and styles that evoke a sense of fantasy and imagination.

Dominant Elements + Modalities: Assess the dominant elements (fire, earth, air, water) and modalities (cardinal, fixed, mutable) in your natal chart. These can give you a general sense of the energies that resonate with you.

Elements:

Fire Signs (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius): People with a dominant Fire element in their chart often prefer bold and energetic aesthetics. They might lean towards vibrant colors, expressive patterns, and styles that showcase their confident and passionate nature.

Earth Signs (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn): A strong Earth element indicates a preference for practical and grounded aesthetics. These individuals might gravitate towards classic and timeless styles, neutral tones, and comfortable yet stylish clothing.

Air Signs (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius): A dominant Air element suggests a preference for intellectual and communicative aesthetics. They might enjoy clean and well-organized styles, modern designs, and clothing that fosters freedom of movement.

Water Signs (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces): A strong Water element points to a preference for emotional and intuitive aesthetics. These individuals might be drawn to soft and flowing fabrics, dreamy colors, and styles that evoke a sense of emotion and sensitivity.

Modalities:

There are three modalities in astrology: Cardinal, Fixed, and Mutable. Each modality reflects different approaches to initiating, stabilizing, and adapting energies, which can be mirrored in one's aesthetic choices:

Cardinal Signs (Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn): A dominant Cardinal modality can lead to an aesthetic that's innovative and trendsetting. These individuals might embrace new styles and trends, showing a willingness to experiment and take the lead in fashion choices.

Fixed Signs (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius): A strong Fixed modality suggests an aesthetic that's stable and consistent. These individuals might lean towards classic pieces, enduring styles, and clothing that reflects their personal taste without necessarily following current trends.

Mutable Signs (Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces): A dominant Mutable modality can result in a versatile and adaptable aesthetic. These individuals might enjoy mixing and matching styles, experimenting with various looks, and being open to a wide range of fashion influences.

For a specified and honed in description for your personal aesthetic, drop your placements in the comments! A part 2 will be available explaining aspects and how your mood, resistance + insecurities, outer world may affect your ability to express your aesthetic

[bups4freak]

HELLO!! DO YOU HAVE TIPS FOR TRANSJAPANESE AS A CISJAPANESE?! /NF

I don’t know exactly how to help because I didn’t grow up in my country of origin 😿😿; but I recommend you consume things from culture. Not talking about animes, but studying the history of the country, trying to learn the language, delving into cultural traditions and modalities, typical foods, clothes, behavior of the Japanese people in general!!

[biohorror-human]

big biohorror-human trans arc update

Yesterday I talked to a doctor about getting estrogen, learned that "estradiol valerate" is pronounced "estra-die-ol valerate", and signed some cool informed consent documents. And then my doctor was like "we'll call you when ur shit is ready for pickup" which. Pickup? Pickup??? Already????? Estrogen ALREADY?

I think I did really good. When the doc was going through all the stuff that estrogen will do to me, potential side effects, I was able to tell her that I literally knew ALL of it prior to the appointment. Even when she was asking which modality I wanted, I had the knowledge to specifically ask for injections, which she explained "has no scientific evidence supporting this method as being better than other modalities" but my reaction speed is so busted I immediately responded with "because there's no evidence that doesn't support it either. It's an understudied section of medicine." And she was genuinely impressed I knew so much about this shit.

Anyways, 3 hours went by and I hadn't yet received the pickup call. This didn't make sense since I was the one who scheduled literally everything. My phone number was on every step of this process- EXCEPT the insurance, which is my mom's. So guess who got the phone call from CVS saying "uhhhh hey your estradiol valerate is ready for pickup at CVS" 3 times?

Yeah it was my DAD who I have not come out to in any way. Apparently his phone number is connected to CVS through the insurance. Specifically only CVS. Only upside: the CVS people may have just said "prescription" and not estradiol valerate. So my dad doesn't know I'm trans. Or he doesn't know what estradiol valerate is. But I'm gonna have to tell him soon enough.

So I went to CVS, showed my pickup barcode to the worker, and here's what I got:

- completely out of stock on 18gx1 needles

- completely out of stock on 23gx1.5 needles

- completely out of stock on 1ml syringes

- insurance hasn't approved my estradiol valerate

- but we do have your alcohol prep pads!!!!!!

So I left with NOTHING except I changed the call for pickup number from my dad's phone to my own. Thank fuck.

They're getting stock back at 6pm TONIGHT. Which is the exact time that my transfemme support group starts, so I'll go pick it up after. But that's like. That's it. It's basically in my hands now. I'm so happy I'm gonna be taking estrogen.

The next step of the operation: hit up thrift stores in the ubersupergay part of town so I can get dripped all the way the fuck out. Once I have enough clothes to be seen as androgynous / feminine at least 5 days a week, I'm going trans mode. And I'm never going back. I hate my old clothes.

[qweerhet]

i really want people to stop looking at "direct action" and thinking "protests." thinking that people who want leftists to focus on direct action > political campaigning want everyone to march around holding signs all the time.

direct action is:

feeding people

giving people clothes

giving people money

forming tenants unions and stopping evictions

letting people stay on your couch or in your guest room

giving people transportation

doing jail support (waiting at jail dropoff spots to give people food, money, and portable phone chargers so they're not lost in the city with no food or way to get home when they're released)

giving people medication

giving people basic first aid and other medical care (this should go without saying but obviously only if you know what you're doing)

creating autonomous and lateral peer trauma work groups outside of the carceral psych system (using trauma work modalities designed to be implemented in lateral peer contexts)

creating and participating in peer conflict intervention and de-escalation groups as alternatives to 911

cleaning people's houses

watching children during parents work hours/doctors appointments/etc

sharing neighborhood resources (i.e. the electric grid in my city is abysmal, people suffer medical crises during 8+ hour power outages multiple times a month during the summers, my partner and i are discussing future plans to organize for backyard electrical generators that could be shared between sets of 2-3 houses)

protests actually are almost never direct action.

the reason direct action > political campaigning is because the point of direct action is to create a world where we are not relying on the government for our basic needs to be met. the point is to create local safety nets autonomous from government decisions. spending your energy on political campaigning is putting all your cards on the idea that This Guy will make the decisions you would to create safety nets. you can cut out the middleman and use the 20 hours a week you were phone banking to just Do That Yourself.

(you cannot do both, individually. political campaigning takes incredible amounts of time and money. that time and money is not being spent on building local safety nets.)